Shells blogs......

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http://shellssells.wordpress.com/

On a lighter note...

I have gotten into the habit of buying chocolate at lunchtime. Not sure when that started. Perhaps it is the fact that the people we work for frequently ply us with chocolate and we have gotten into a habit. When I don't have chocolate around, sometimes I run down the the vending machine and buy a Hershey's with almonds bar. Generally I would call this "junk" chocolate but it does hit the spot when necessary.

What I don't like....is to be told, by the wrapper how to open my chocolate! "Hold here" "Tear here" Come on! It is chocolate, I am gonna find a way to get to it without instructions! Is this really necessary? I seem to be slightly bothered by this every time I decide to have a Hershey's bar.

Similarly bothersome in my opinion is road signs which yell at me. I don't like being told what to do on a good day, it is infinitely irritating to have a road sign say "You are going 56 MPH, SLOW DOWN NOW!!!" Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?

Jonah

We are studying Jonah at church right now. This week was Jonah 1, the sermon was very interesting and insightful. But that is not what I will be writing about. I picked up on something which I wanted to keep as a reminder here.

First the story:

Jonah 1 (New International Version)
Jonah Flees From the LORD
1 The word of the LORD came to Jonah son of Amittai: 2 "Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me."
3 But Jonah ran away from the LORD and headed for Tarshish. He went down to Joppa, where he found a ship bound for that port. After paying the fare, he went aboard and sailed for Tarshish to flee from the LORD.
4 Then the LORD sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up. 5 All the sailors were afraid and each cried out to his own god. And they threw the cargo into the sea to lighten the ship.
But Jonah had gone below deck, where he lay down and fell into a deep sleep. 6 The captain went to him and said, "How can you sleep? Get up and call on your god! Maybe he will take notice of us, and we will not perish."
7 Then the sailors said to each other, "Come, let us cast lots to find out who is responsible for this calamity." They cast lots and the lot fell on Jonah.
8 So they asked him, "Tell us, who is responsible for making all this trouble for us? What do you do? Where do you come from? What is your country? From what people are you?"
9 He answered, "I am a Hebrew and I worship the LORD, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the land."
10 This terrified them and they asked, "What have you done?" (They knew he was running away from the LORD, because he had already told them so.)
11 The sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked him, "What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?"
12 "Pick me up and throw me into the sea," he replied, "and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you."
13 Instead, the men did their best to row back to land. But they could not, for the sea grew even wilder than before. 14 Then they cried to the LORD, "O LORD, please do not let us die for taking this man's life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you, O LORD, have done as you pleased." 15 Then they took Jonah and threw him overboard, and the raging sea grew calm. 16 At this the men greatly feared the LORD, and they offered a sacrifice to the LORD and made vows to him.
17 But the LORD provided a great fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was inside the fish three days and three nights.


My thoughts and reminders:

Since I spent a good portion of my 20's "running" it was rather interesting to delve into this first chapter. How many times I have ran! Ran to New Jersey, only to run to Pennsylvania only 7 months later, only to run to Nebraska fairly soon after. It has been an interesting journey as even when I was making decisions pell-mell on an adrenaline rush, I can frighteningly easily see where God has either "kicked me in the butt" for what I was doing or led things to happen even though I chose an option I do not believe he would have wanted for me. Funny thing, this ability to choose. So I was struck by Jonah and his running, so obviously against God's will. Yet not only can he not get away with it, but God makes use of his peril, leading sailors to Him.

Though I would, at this point in my life, prefer to not make decisions in the previous manner, it is reassuring that though I have made some poor choices, the Lord is way more powerful than I and can turn something I have done into something better than it would be if it was left up to me.

Knitting

I made this hat for my daughter earlier this season in order to match her Pooh Bear coat. Pictures of the mittens to come later.

Insomnia

Yes, I admit it, I can be a bit of an insomniac. It isn't the usual insomnia where I can't get to sleep. I get to sleep just fine. But I can't stay asleep. Usually 2 AM rolls around and I am wide awake till about 4:30. At that point, I have a decision to make, do I just get up, have some coffee, and get on with my day? Or do I really continue to attempt another hour or so of sleep. Even if I do sleep through the night I have this slightly annoying habit of waking up quite early, between 4:30 and 5:30 in the morning. Then of course around midday I hit a wall, I practically can't think anymore and need a nap. Once I make it through the day and put my daughter to bed, I suddenly feel like 8PM would be a lovely bedtime. But I know that if I go to bed at 8, I am just exacerbating the issue.

Good thing tomorrow is Saturday. I can actually get a nap. Sunday's are nice too.

Leaving

Well Uncle is gone now. We took him to the airport this morning. I suspect my daughter is not going to take kindly to this. I do have to admit I sometimes wonder how she deals with people being in and out of her life so constantly. On the other hand, family is important even if they are far away.

I think our saving grace this evening will be that I have enabled her video habit by picking up cheap ($.99) VHS tapes of "Lady and the Tramp" and "Aristocats." I know she will be upset about Uncle leaving and the house is trashed due to her being home for 5 days. Uncle helped as best he could but I know what it is like, she can trash it a lot faster than you can clean it. So some video's might help facilitate my getting the place back in shape. Which is necessary for my own peace of mind!

I love visitors but I do love the place to myself as well. It is not a big enough home for frequent guests. I am looking forward to the relative quiet that being alone affords me.

Knitting

I decided to make a hat for my brother while he was visiting. It knitted up quickly, was fun to do, and looks quite good on him. On the other hand, the hat is back in my hands because he "just doesn't wear hats." (Luckily it doesn't look half bad on me either.)

Lent

I have a lovely older coworker who is my "adopted grandmother" here. She and her husband have been very good to me, making sure I felt that I have family in the area. The other day she mentioned that she was going to give up chocolate for lent. Now, last year, I cannot remember where (though I have my suspicions) I heard the argument that it might be more logical to have someone besides yourself pick something to give up for lent. I do not come from a denomination that practices lent, so the concept is slightly foreign to me but I thought that was a neat idea. This year, when my coworker talked about giving up chocolate, I remembered this and stated that I should perhaps get to pick what she is giving up and it certainly wouldn't be chocolate. I argued that coffee might be a much better option. I said so flippantly. I was practically joking. I just was expressing what I thought was an interesting concept. Well she went right home and told her husband and told her church group and I found out today that she is indeed giving up coffee for lent. She thought that it might just be a great idea for lent and that if she could do it for lent perhaps it would "stick" making her healthier all around. She said it never occurred to her to give up something which was so much part of her routine and her life. It never occurred to her that coffee was an option. She was grateful that someone would point that out to her. (Seriously, she drinks pots of the stuff all day long!) So this morning is her first coffee less day, though I noticed she was trying out tea yesterday as well. She enjoyed a chocolate frosted donut in the meantime and I mentioned to her that she wouldn't have been able to enjoy that little treat had she gone on her first instinct.

I have learned something from this too....You just do not know how your words affect those around you. This is a lesson best learned quickly and remembered. I said something flippantly and it "took". What seeds do we plant daily in the minds of others that we would rather not plant? What seeds do we plant daily that would be helpful and beneficial to another person? What do we say to our friends, family, coworkers, children? Is it uplifting? Are we making statements we want to be remembered by? What seeds do we plant daily in our own minds that are not the least bit beneficial or uplifting? Can we plant good seeds in others minds when we can't do so with ourselves?

A very special thank you to Cherie, my "sister of the fingers" (and sister of my heart) for your help in putting this post together, meanwhile being reminded and learning and "walking" along side me.

James 3 (Contemporary English Version)
The Tongue
1My friends, we should not all try to become teachers. In fact, teachers will be judged more strictly than others. 2All of us do many wrong things. But if you can control your tongue, you are mature and able to control your whole body.
3By putting a bit into the mouth of a horse, we can turn the horse in different directions. 4It takes strong winds to move a large sailing ship, but the captain uses only a small rudder to make it go in any direction. 5Our tongues are small too, and yet they brag about big things.
It takes only a spark to start a forest fire! 6The tongue is like a spark. It is an evil power that dirties the rest of the body and sets a person's entire life on fire with flames that come from hell itself. 7All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and sea creatures can be tamed and have been tamed. 8But our tongues get out of control. They are restless and evil, and always spreading deadly poison.
9-10My dear friends, with our tongues we speak both praises and curses. We praise our Lord and Father, and we curse people who were created to be like God, and this isn't right. 11Can clean water and dirty water both flow from the same spring? 12Can a fig tree produce olives or a grapevine produce figs? Does fresh water come from a well full of salt water?

Wisdom from Above
13Are any of you wise or sensible? Then show it by living right and by being humble and wise in everything you do. 14But if your heart is full of bitter jealousy and selfishness, don't brag or lie to cover up the truth. 15That kind of wisdom doesn't come from above. It is earthly and selfish and comes from the devil himself. 16Whenever people are jealous or selfish, they cause trouble and do all sorts of cruel things. 17But the wisdom that comes from above leads us to be pure, friendly, gentle, sensible, kind, helpful, genuine, and sincere. 18When peacemakers plant seeds of peace, they will harvest justice.

Potty training

Today she tells me...."my bottom spilled, mommy!"

Disney Update

Puppies.....is now called "almation dot puppies"

Too cute!

Attitude

Well my daughter did not cry when she saw that her PopPop was not on the plane. I did talk to her about the fact that PopPop had to work. She seemed to accept that. All weekend long she has been holding that against her Nana though. If Nana asks her a question, the answer will always be "NO!" If Nana wants to help her with something, she will take it to Uncle instead. If Nana talks to her, she gives Nana a look that just screams "How dare you talk to me!" and when Nana sings to her, she says "YOU!, Be quiet!" On the other hand, she is all out of sorts if Nana is not in the room with her, and wants to know where she is. She is busy showering her affections on Uncle anyhow.

My mom swears she is acting just as I did when I was a kid and my father worked out of town. He was only home on the weekends and I spent the weekends giving him a hard time in a similar fashion.

Now Uncle is home with her while I work for the next 3 days. We will see how it goes. I am sure it will be a lovely time of bonding for them both and "birth control" for him! They have found a mutual love of computer games, and I am sure that will keep them occupied.

I got a call from Uncle today while I was at work. He wanted to know how long a nap my daughter should be taking without him getting worried. I asked him how long she had been sleeping. He said an hour and 45 minutes. I asked if he had the monitor turned on, and he did. I said, her sleeping a long time is not something to worry over, rather something to rejoice over! Enjoy your free time and get her up at 4 if she is still asleep. With her, if she sleeps well for a nap, she will sleep better at night.

All better

My daughter seems to be feeling much better. She really tried to be grumpy with me this morning but she just couldn't! She didn't even want to take her binkie in the car (thank goodness for small miracles).

Her father brought her a small Dalmatian stuffed puppy which she is quite enjoying. It is old, obviously used, I have no idea where he got it, but she loves it. She wanted to take it to school today. She said while in the car "my puppy is SO silly!" She just couldn't wait to get to school and show her little friend Thomas her puppy. Luckily Thomas was there when we got there, and she just ran right up to him, showed him her puppy and her gloves. I was rearranging her things when she comes barrelling toward me and grabs my legs. I look down to see Thomas right behind her and she is just giggling and screeching and saying "Thomas chasing me!" Then she turns right around and returns the favor. I just looked at her teacher and laughed because it is so obvious she is feeling better and we are both so relieved. I do feel a twinge of guilt for the teacher though, poor gal, she is going to have her hands full today.

My mom and brother are due in today at 1:45ish. Doesn't look like it is going to happen. They were delayed right from the start. I asked them to please call me when they get to their layover but have not heard from them. I suppose I can just stay at work though I was really looking forward to leaving early today. I have been telling my daughter that Nana and Uncle are coming to visit, but she keeps getting irritated with me, telling me that surely PopPop will be visiting too. I try to explain that it will just be Nana and Uncle but she will have none of that. It will break my mothers heart if she cries when seeing that PopPop indeed is not coming but I have a feeling that is what will happen.

To those of you who catch me online on a regular basis, I will be very scarce this weekend but look forward to catching up on Monday.

Faxes!

I got another fax call from JCR distribution. I really had wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. It is unfortunate that they did not take care of this issue. I again called the company and got the name and extension of the man who handles such things. He had a doctor's appointment this morning and I had to leave a voice mail. Have I mentioned that I hate the phone? I did leave a very precise and logical voice mail message much to my own surprise and we will see if he calls me back.

My daughter seems to be ill. She had a terrible day at childcare crying most of the day, though no one called me to tell me. The next day went better but she did not eat at all. She didn't eat for me either once she was home barring a small chunk of cheese. I suppose the protein helped. She is drinking plenty of fluids and I am not concerned. On the other hand, I am not feeling so well either. It came on strong and fast last night. I tried to get some sleep early but the insomnia was kicking in too. It is OK though, my mom and brother will be here tomorrow and I can be actually sick while they watch Riley providing I need to be. Just have a few important things to get done today and I will be free up tomorrow.

Laundry list

To start with, no 2:30 AM faxes so I must be off the list. Considering my great fear of the phone, I am surprised the incident managed to get me so worked up so fast that I would choose to call the company. After all, I am sitting on all those payday loan spam text messages on my cell phone which are costing me 5 cents each and making me angry yet not angry enough to call the phone company and complain about it!

My daughter woke up yesterday morning with a whole laundry list of complaints. It is apparently in our very nature to complain. And the more words we have the more willing we are to use them. I got up early and started my morning routine but somewhere along the line heard her crying. Typically she would play happily in her bed until I am done with my routine and it is her turn, but not this morning. I went up to get her and the complaints just came pouring out.

"My nose is runny, need a tissue"
"Need a binkie!"
"I'm wet"
"Chocolate milk all gone!"
"Chocolate milk on Baa" (this one might need some additional info, Baa is a white stuffed sheep she sleeps with)
"Mr. Potato head arm fall out!" (the arm was on the floor next to the crib)

I just laughed and marvelled at how fast language develops in this age. A month ago she would not have been able to get all those thoughts across. Maybe one or two complaints, but not a laundry list!

In anticipation of the arrival of my mother and brother this weekend, I have been hard at work doing some additional deep cleaning. Last evening I went to look under my bed and saw that my daughter has been using my bedskirt as a cool hiding place. All neatly lined up next to a chair she sits in to watch tv, but under the bedskirt, was a sippy cup, a bottle (both of which who knows how long they have been there!) a small dancing girl figurine, and a peanut butter sandwich I was under the impression she had eaten. I will have to remember to check there more often.

In other news....I have been asked to share my "story", all of it, from start to finish. It may take some time but I am commited to at least working on it. I have been asked before but to present before groups of women is very intimidating. So I have not accepted. Perhaps writing it down will give me the courage to share in other venues when asked. We will see.

Update

I called JCR today and thought I would start out as sweet as sugar. The whole "draw more flies with honey" saying and all. I called and asked if they had a fax machine with the number 214-XXX-XXXX associated with them. The person I spoke to said "no." I explained that I did indeed receive a call from said number at 2:30AM on my home phone and that the caller ID showed his company. He then mentioned that they did have a fax machine that dialed out overnight. OK so now we are changing our tune. That is fine, just get me OFF that list! We will see....